Friday, December 26, 2014

The GINGERBREAD House

We awoke Christmas Day to the sounds of my grandchild, who is 4 years old, very much filled with the excitement of Santa Claus and the GIFTS that he brings.  She keeps this part of Christmas Spirit alive and the excitement that she displays is beyond measure.  Her childlike enthusiasm is so innocent and pure it takes me back to my childhood memories of my Christmas.

We opened presents, shared in jokes and laughter and made cinnamon rolls for breakfast, built a fire that cooked us all here in the south (it was all in the idea that it would be awesome to build a fire) and then we cleaned up the mess of the packages unwrapped.  For instance, we had a bag for used bows, a bag for boxes, a bag for trash, a bag for recyclables and a bag for ribbon that could be used again next year.  

We examined our gifts, commenced to nap taking, watching T.V. or just lingering in the family room. We remained in our P.J.'s most of the day.  The smell from the kitchen was overwhelming which eventually drew us all into this space.  Of course, not many offered to assist in the cooking of the goods, but what did happen was the sounds and volume of music was turned up and the dancing began.  Everyone danced to some very up beat tunes and shared in, once again, laughter.

The laughter of my family was finest Christmas present gifted to me this year. No one can box up laughter and send it as a present, it is gifted by those that you love, in situations that are unplanned and/or in the unconditional moments of life.  It releases all sorts of endorphin's that temporarily triggers all sorts of benefits to your mind, body and spirit.  Consequently, in our family, the laughter also triggers other series of other events, which I would like to call 'memories'.

It is in the memories that will be passed down from year to year, not the gifts that were wrapped, but in the experience of each other loving one another.  It is in the vulnerability of opening up to one another in the movement of their spirit.  And it is in the vulnerability, this closeness that brings about a spirit of family and more laughter.

After dinner the family gathered to make a Gingerbread house.  There were two kids that were responsible to decorate one side and the other two were to decorate yet the other.  There was honest competition among them and laughter.  I stayed on the out skirts of their sticky mess and watched and listened to each of them, working together to create a magical gingerbread house.  All in all, I was thinking about each of their gifts that they were bringing to the house.  The youngest was gifting her spirit of excitement, the other was gifting her perfection, one was gifting her creativity and lastly, one child was engineering the house to remain in place for weeks to come before it is deposited into the trash can.    

The spirit of teamwork among my children is also a favorite gift received this year. The teamwork and the gifts they share and their unconditional love for one another is reason to give Thanks.   It is in teamwork, working together, living in harmony is something that God wants for us all.  In having harmony, laughter, working together, we are able to do God's will. This, teamwork, after all, is a very clear statement in the Bible.

1 Corinthians 12:14  "Now the body is not a single part, but many." 

It took skillful practice to create our gingerbread house and it also took a skillful practice to accept each other's differences and gifts presented that day.  

As Christmas day has passed, I get to hold on to the gingerbread house for a couple of more weeks.  I get to visibly remember the laughter and the gifts of harmony that were brought to my table to create this little candy treasure.

My Christmas gifts this year:  laughter and harmony.


Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Christmas Favorites

I arose out of bed at 6:00am Christmas Eve morning thinking to myself, I am going to cuddle up on my sofa with my dogs and drink coffee and wait for the tribe to arise out of bed. The house was chilly, so I grabbed a blanket and headed for the sofa, checked my phone for any updates on social media. My phone had several messages from my daughter who left for work about an hour earlier than when I woke up. Her text message was so long she should have written a book and gotten paid.  My coffee waited as I pursued to read and read some more.  Essentially, she wanted me to take my grand-daughter to the doctor, run to her house and pick up a few items, check on the lights and so forth.  Sometimes, well most times, I think she should pay me as her hired help.  

I called the doctor and was informed that I needed to be at the office in about 30 minutes.  So, in a scurry I grabbed clothes, woke the grand-baby and headed out the door only to wait at the doctor's office for an hour in the waiting room, an hour in the exam room and 45 minutes at the pharmacy.  This waiting set the stage for Christmas reminiscing.  My daughter's text message procured three hours off my initial sip of coffee, breakfast and cuddling up with my dogs.  Nothing goes as expected.  

Here's what I thought about in those three hours of waiting.....

My Christmas Favorites:

1.  CHRISTMAS FLAGS on my house, especially the one pictured above.  Each season I bring out a new flag to hang by my porch.  The flag above is one that I purchased this year, couldn't find my other one, but that's okay, I really am glad I could not find my old flag because this one really brings a smile on my face.  

2.  LAST MINUTE SHOPPING especially when you know everything is already purchased and you have maintained your budget......so, you reward yourself and buy more.  It is always these last minute gifts that seem to be the best gifts given.  No thoughts, spontaneous buying, no budget, the BEST gifts!!!!

3.  SNOW.  My fondest memories while growing up was on the 1st of December.  My family placed bets on whether we would have a white Christmas.  We don't place bets down here in the south, only in the north because everyone would all guess that there would be NO snow, because it is just to dang hot down here in the south.  Maybe we should bet whether or not the weather will be above 70 degrees or below.  Now that would be a change up in tradition. 

4.  MUSIC..... Now you would think that I love listening to the sounds of Christmas music and I do, don't get me wrong, but on Christmas Eve we all usually get together in the kitchen and all of us start baking our desserts for Christmas day and we turn up the music (top pop music) and dance and sing and bake.  We each get to display our dance moves, including my son, and we laugh till we can't laugh any more!!!! I'm not sure what we are baking this year, but I will think of something just to see the moves... 

5. GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE.  I loved going to see my grandparents over the Christmas holidays when  I was a child.  They created very special memories that have lasted a lifetime. I hope my grand-daughter has the same sentiments when she grows up and looks back in time.  

6.  LIGHTS.  On Christmas Eve we go and see the Christmas lights around the neighborhood.  There are usually more than the legal amount of people in our car, so we are all squished and everyone is complaining in a fun way and we see the lights and then we are glad it is over.  

7.  MIDNIGHT MASS:  I love to agitate my family when I tell them we need to leave at 10:50pm for midnight mass.  It only takes 10 minutes to get to church, but I, in my anticipation of mass, want us all to sit together and not to worry about getting split up at mass because there is not enough seating and not to gather frustration about no parking spaces.  I like to just sit in the pews for an hour and listen to the music and pray.  My family says I create  more frustration for them than they would have with the idea of being split up and walking two miles.  I think they are always joking, so we always leave at 10:50 for midnight mass. 

8.  PRESENTS.  I like to see the presents under the tree Christmas morning, but I dislike wrapping them.  My back hurts after this marathon event.  No one usually volunteers to help me so I have to use force to get someone to assist.  I always wonder why I am responsible for this task...???go figure..

9.  KIDS... Even though my children are all almost adults, they are still my kids and I still love the moment of surprise when they open their presents.  Even if they have already peeked, they still are really good at faking it.  I hope they have not peeked.  I love to see my kids smile and I most certainly love the gift giving part.

10.  ANTICIPATION of Christ being born.  As we have all prepared this month of December for the birth of Christ, you see a change in people attitudes.  There is less hostility, more generosity, and a holy reminder everywhere of what is to become on the 25th.  Everyone knows, everyone shares in the celebration.  There are a few that grumble, but I believe the spirit is greater than the grumbling. 

Merry Christmas!  

Gospel LK 1:67-79
Zechariah his father, filled with the Holy Spirit, prophesied, saying: 

“Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel;
for he has come to his people and set them free.
He has raised up for us a mighty Savior,
born of the house of his servant David.
Through his prophets he promised of old
that he would save us from our enemies,
from the hands of all who hate us.
He promised to show mercy to our fathers
and to remember his holy covenant.
This was the oath he swore to our father Abraham:
to set us free from the hand of our enemies,
free to worship him without fear,
holy and righteous in his sight
all the days of our life.
You, my child, shall be called the prophet of the Most High,
for you will go before the Lord to prepare his way,
to give his people knowledge of salvation
by the forgiveness of their sins.
In the tender compassion of our God
the dawn from on high shall break upon us,
to shine on those who dwell in darkness and the shadow of death,
and to guide our feet into the way of peace.”



Sunday, December 21, 2014

A second impression, a different meaning..


One of my daughters loves the arts and supports the arts every chance that she has and while she supports the arts, she has mastered the art of including me in her passion.  We go to ballets, orchestra performances and the like, and I probably would show initiative and ask her to go with me, but she always beats me to the punch.  Last night we went to see the Rockettes.  Although, I really wanted to see the Rockettes, I did not want to pay the price of the ticket.  I created a new line item on my budget and paid for the tickets and my two daughters, my grandchild and myself all went to enjoy the Christmas spectacular with a few thousand other people.  

I have never seen the Rockettes before this day and my initial suspicion was that the show was going to be dancing to the up beat tunes of the 'Holiday Season'.  I said the 'Holiday Season' because I did not think the Rockettes would institute the 'real' theme of Christmas in their performance.  My impression was wrong.  During the middle of the show they choreographed and danced to the most spectacular performance around the "Nativity".  I was more than impressed!!  I was now convinced that this show was not some 'high kick' theater performance under the stars, but a performance that drew us into the true meaning of Christmas; the" Birth of Christ" and the joy of the season.  I was glad I paid the high price to see this group celebrate in the birth of Christ and to support their mission as a troupe to spread God's message.  

At church today, I was reminded of the '12 days of Christmas' song in the homily of the mass.  I immediately was drawn to the lyrics and started humming the tune in my head.  As always, the impression that most get when they hear this tune, that has been carried from generation to generation, is one of  'Holiday' cheer. Nonetheless, our priest reminded us that this song was intended for Catholics to secretly learn their faith in England between 1558 and 1829 when it was a crime to be a Catholic.  The song was a way to learn and remember their faith.  

The true meaning behind the song goes like this:

1 Partridge in a Pear Tree = Jesus Christ, Son of God
2 Turtle Doves = The Old and New Testaments
3 French Hens = Faith, Hope and Charity, the Theological Virtues
4 Calling Birds = the Four Gospels and/or the Four Evangelist
5 Golden Rings = The first Five Books of the Old Testament, the "Pentateuch", which gives the history of man's fall from grace. 
6 Geese A-Laying = the six days of creation
7 Swans A-swimming = the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit, the seven sacraments
8 Maids A-milking = the eight beatitudes
9 Ladies Dancing = the nine Fruits of the Holy Spirit
10 Lords A-Leaping = the ten commandments
11 Pipers Piping = the eleven faithful apostles
12 Drummers Drumming = the twelve points of doctrine in the Apostle's Creed

As we get closer to the Birth of Christ, it is easy to dismiss the true meaning, the story behind the word 'Christmas'.  I knew that the song 'The 12 days of Christmas" had been intended to teach the catechism of the Catholic Church to Catholic people long ago, I learned that in my religion classes when I was a child, but it was easier for me to dismiss the meaning when other words were put in the lyrics. It is also easy for me to hurry about as I shop and add up how much I have spent on each child, grandchild and spouse on presents and to make sure I have spread the wealth of gifts evenly instead of truly thinking of the gift of Christ.  

I too, like you, get caught up in the song and dance of it all and fail to stop, listen and pray.  

I have 4 days left to get my song and dance perfected like the Rockettes, to share the message that a new born King is about to arrive. 

This is after all the "Christmas Spectacular!"

Thank you Rockettes! May the show go on.....






Sunday, December 14, 2014

Grasshopper

I saw this grasshopper on my home the other day. I was getting into my car and it was just sitting there on the brick wall with no other grasshoppers in sight.  I found it odd that I saw this grasshopper  and particularly odd to have found this one in December.  A peculiar sight, if you will...

I took this picture because of the oddness of it.  I was not thinking that I would later write about it, but often times while taking pictures I usually do recall something in my memory that draws me to the subject in the picture, hence I get an inner urging to snap photos of the subject.

I believe in and or around 1986 there was a movie called 'Kung Fu' and in this movie a young man was given the name 'grasshopper', a term or name of endearment.  It typically refers to a student, beginner still learning, a person who has much to learn".  A grasshopper can also refer to someone who hops from one thing to another, never focusing on one single subject at a time.  I believe both of these definitions hold true to my personality.

I am not currently a student.  I have done my time, graduated from college several times with several degrees, all of which I am most grateful.   I work, mother, grandmother and just try to keep my 'head in the game'.  I do love school and wish I could go back, but for now, enrollment in a college is far from my immediate goals. I still consider myself a 'student in life'.  I am learning, still making mistakes and learning from my mistakes.  I also hop from one thing to another, fascinated with life and all that it has to offer.  Each day I take notes of all the things that I think of or items I want to address, goals or chores or something I just want to create.  Today for instance, I want to rake off the pine needles off my driveway, finish a book, wrap Christmas presents, make fudge, bathe my dogs, play with my grand-baby, write, exercise, grocery shop, sew and phone my loved ones.  The list goes on as the day progresses.  My mind rarely quiets itself and I have to practice this art of silence daily or I would literally go insane with all the drummed up expectations and noise that I hear within.

I visit the Blessed Sacrament in Adoration weekly and I have been doing this for many years, every Tuesday, one hour given to God.  Sometimes it is hard to stop the fast pace life and say 'no' to the other activities and to my family, just so I can go give one hour to my Lord.  I am often times tempted to find a substitute so I can continue the hoping from one thing to the next.  But when I go to Adoration, enter the chapel and hear the silence, my inner grasshopper stops.  My focus is diverted on God.  There is silence in the chapel, a reverence beyond measure for all that enter.  It is a moment in time when  I reach to God and God is reaching for me. I adore, give thanks, repent and bask in his love for me and I bask in the quiet of my mind, heart and soul. It is a gift that I receive each Tuesday evening.

In the movie "Kung Fu" there is a conversation from Master Po and his student Caine.  He is teaching him to listen and in listening he attempts to gain wisdom.  The conversation goes something like this:

Master Po (blind):  Close your eyes.  What do you hear?
Young Caine:  I hear the water, I hear the birds.
Po:  Do you hear your own heartbeat?
Caine:  NO.
Po:  Do you hear the grasshopper which is at your feet?
Caine:  Old man, how is it that you hear these things?
Po:  Young man, how is it that you do not?


If I hop from noise and distraction to silence, I am lead into contemplative prayer with my Divine Master.  It takes practice, I am a 'not so young' grasshopper at heart.

Matthew 26:40 "So, could you not watch with me one hour?"   , grasshopper? 

Monday, December 8, 2014

Immaculate Conception

This is my prayer box. It sits at my dining room table on the floor near a window, hidden from all that walk in my door.  It has my bible, my journal, pens, and other devotional books which are interchanged as time passes throughout the seasons of our Catholic liturgical church year.

I am sure we all have rituals that we go through in our prayer lives, each very private and yet unique. I have several bibles, one for my purse, one for adoration and one for home, and then there are others. Today, instead of reaching for my bible, I pulled out the "Catechism of the Catholic Church" book.  I re-read the profession of my faith and then moved to the section of the Immaculate Conception, item #488 since today is a Holy Day of Obligation, the 'Immaculate Conception'.

It reads:
"God sent forth his Son," but to prepare a body for him, he wanted the free cooperation of a creature.  For this, from all eternity God chose for the mother of his son a daughter of Israel, a young Jewish woman of Nazareth in Galilee, "a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David; and the virgin's name was Mary". #490, ...The Angel Gabriel at the moment of the annunciation salutes her as "full of grace."

I pondered upon Mary's role this morning, her state of grace and how privilege the almighty God placed such merits upon her to carry our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  Mary brought Him into the world and blessed all of mankind.  She is so pure.  We are so blessed.

I have been blessed by God to birth four amazing children into the world, so they too can carry out the message of God. However, having said that, we carry the stain of sin upon us and in our attempts to love and move His message to our neighbor, family, friend we often times fail. In our failure though, through God's unconditional love, He opens His arms wide and helps us back up on our feet so we can start all over again.  Mary was pure and holy without a single sin to prevent her from that one thing called 'love'.

It is the season to move beyond the past and move forward with new light that God wants us to shine and bring forth to those that do not know Him.  It is the season to re-read the messages/stories of Jesus and to be reminded that in Mary's obedience, her consent to God, she aided in the salvation of all of the human race.

Today, my prayer is this:

Hail Mary full of grace,
the Lord is with Thee.  
Blessed art thou among women, 
and blessed is the fruit 
of they womb, Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, 
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death. 
Amen


Sunday, December 7, 2014

Guests

The other evening, my husband and myself were out doing errands, enjoying the evening without interruptions from our children/grandchild.  We were in the beginning stages of Christmas shopping and we were almost nearing the end of our shopping when my phone started buzzing.  I had it on silent, but it stilled buzzed to notify me of an up and coming message.

My daughter texted me stating they had an emergency and we needed to hurry home.  Her message was simple "HELP, EMERGENCY!  IT'S REALLY BIG".  Her message was followed by a picture of a lizard on our ceiling.  You could barely see the little critter so I had to zoom in on the picture to really identify what it was that was "REALLY BIG".  Once I got my reading glasses out and zoomed in on the picture, I was able to identify that the critter indeed was a lizard.  

The lizard was just under 5 inches long, nothing I would call "BIG" and it was very unassuming, non-threatening, as it was located on our 10 foot ceiling, in the entry way.  It was not bothering anyone in the home, it wasn't in the family room or their bedrooms, kitchen or other place of gathering.  It was just on the ceiling, sitting, watching and waiting for the front door to open so it could resume its' life outside.  

The emergency had my husband and myself laughing and most certainly, when we arrived home they were screaming and stating we had better kill it quick because they were not going to sleep until the lizard was dead.  Again, we continued to laugh which fueled their anger and made them very nervous.  

I got my ladder and dust mop, climbed and tried to get my little outdoor friend to jump off the ceiling.   In a quick motion of my mop, the lizard flew quicker than my eyes could follow.  I had no clue where he went.  The screaming from my children began again.  They were scrambling and yelling stating "hurry, kill him'.  

My husband came to my rescue and we found him in the dining room, again resting, and probably wondering why there was so much commotion. I was able to get him on the end of the pole of my mop and swiftly moved outdoors and placed him in a bed of rocks.  

This morning at church, I was reminded, once again, of my little lizard friend when our priest spoke about guests using the front door or the back door of our home.  He mentioned "when the door bell rings, do you look and see who is there, pretend you are not at home, or answer the door and politely put the guests in the 'nice' part of your house, as a waiting zone, until they state their business and leave OR do your guest come through the back door, walk in unassuming, help themselves in the disorderly chaos of your home, feeling very welcomed?  Our priest related this message to our relationship to Jesus.  Is Jesus the uninvited guest at the front door of your home or is he the back door friend who appears regularly at your home? 

I walked away from church today and thought heavily on my relationship with Jesus. I also thought about the lizard.  God must not only be in our lives constantly, but we must always welcome Him in our moments of chaos, inviting him in constantly through prayer.    

For now though, I believe Mr. lizard will only be a front door guest in my home. He will be escorted out once he states his business. 

Friday, November 28, 2014

Early Walk


Making sense of it all....

Intuition....

A spiritual longing....

I am not sure why God pulled me out of bed so early this morning.  I wanted to lay in bed and be drugged by sweet dreams and deep sleep.  He had other plans for me this day after Thanksgiving. The house is quiet and so by fear of waking everyone, I tiptoed to the closet and pulled out my sweat pants and sweat shirt, painfully bent over and slipped on my socks and shoes and stepped outside for a walk.  It was chilly this morning, so the sweatshirt came in handy.  

It has been awhile since I have had an early morning walk, and even more unusual that I did not have my morning brew,  I obeyed God and continued to move in the direction in which I was being pulled, out into the street to pound the pavement.  It was quiet.  The families of my neighborhood were snuggled in their beds, they had gone to work or they were out doing 'Black Friday' shopping. Either way, it was quiet.  I could hear only the rustling of a few squirrels in the leaves at the bottom of the trees, gathering their nuts and preparing for the winter.  

The squirrels didn't seem to mind my presence, especially once I entered the path where most of them seemed to be gathering.  They did hone into me and stopped and stared as I passed by, staying very still, watching and waiting.  I did not appear to be a threat to them, it must have been their intuition that I was only going on a walk, not squirrel hunting.  My intuition was to keep moving as God was pulling and pushing me forward, and I presume He wanted to show me something.  

After a half mile, I wanted to call it quits and come back home and settle down with a cup of coffee. I didn't.  God didn't let me.  He is very persistent.  Spirit continued to move within me, stirring my emotions and thoughts into pondering how great He is and how blessed I am that He wanted to share this morning with me.  As I continued to walk the course of three miles, not one car passed, human, dog or bike.  It was just me and God.  

In a moment of clarity, Spirit was a palpable presence bearing witness to an awakening of pure beauty and divine intervention in my walk.  The dots were being connected at the end of my three miles.  The walk began to resonate deep within that this walk was all that God wanted for me.  He wanted me to have a moment of silence and beauty for my day.  He wanted me to start my day with Him.  It was His gift to me. He also wanted to walk alongside me this morning as I prayed and dwelled in His shelter.  He knew my thoughts, my yearnings, my pain, my joys and my desire to know what He wants for me.  

God insists that we follow Him and in His ways.  It is very easy, especially as the new season of Advent begins, to be very distracted by the temptations of the world, to be lured into the trappings of all earthly temptations and enticed away from God. I am most blessed this morning to have walked with God. I needed a reminder, a slap on the hand, a time out, as a child of God to be more persistent in prayer and love.

My feet led me back home.  I was no longer yearning for answers from God. Silence was the gift that I accepted. My only yearnings that remained this morning as I crossed the threshold of my home was for coffee and a warm blanket.      


Deuteronomy 13: 5-6
"The Lord, your God, shall you follow,and him shall you fear; his commandment shall you observe, and his voice shall you heed, serving him and holding fast to him alone". 

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Thanksgiving Brainstorm







My grandchild is sitting here next to me making cards for her mother.  She loves to color pictures, but more than anything, she loves to be the giver.  We receive many cards and pictures from her on a daily basis.  She has prompted me today to write about my reason to give thanks.


1.  Homemade pictures by grandchild even though I only receive about 5% of them.  Her mother receives the other 95%.  At least I know where I stand with her, second best isn't all that bad.

2.  Coffee first thing in the morning.  Without coffee, I may growl!!  I may also bite your head off.....Grrrrrr......

3.  Quiet places for prayer time.  I especially like to find a niche, whether it is in the library, the chapel, or at home to meditate on the gospel.  Without this guidance and counsel from God, I fear I may self destruct.

4.  Ice cream!!!!!!!!!!!  I should probably put this at the top of my list, maybe even before coffee.  I am addicted!!!  Once a day, habit!

5.  A good nights sleep.  After raising 4 children and sleeping with a husband that snores and three dogs, a good nights sleep is a rare find and this is why I carry baggage under my eyes.

6.  A Pay Check.  After working hard all week, the reward is nice.  Especially having food on my table and a roof over my head, and of course....shopping.

7.  My Bathroom.  I hate public restrooms.  I know this may sound weird, but I absolutely hate public restrooms.  I just think of all the backsides of people I do not know sitting in the same place doing their duty.  Yuck.  I would rather go in the woods.  I am thankful for my bathroom

8.  Smart People.  Without smart people we may not have the things that make life easier, and because of smart people, I don't have to work as hard.  Just think about the typewriter before it had the capability to back space and auto correct.  What would we do without the computer?  Can you imagine going back to the typewriter????  Not me.

9.  Dog Hair.  Although, my floor in my home has plenty of dog hair floating around like tumbleweeds, I am most grateful for my dogs.  They give me the most unprecedented joy.

10.  Sounds of the Kitchen.  When I hear sounds in the kitchen, I know it won't be long before I am fed.  My husband likes to cook and I like it when he cooks because then I don't have too.  It always taste better and I'm not tired when I sit down to eat.   I'm grateful for my ALL of my children because they can clean up the dinner dishes afterwards.  Thanks be to God.

11.  Friends.  Especially those that know I love them even though I don't keep in touch regularly. I'm really lousy about communicating.  I want to hear all about their life, but it is dreadful for me to talk about mine.  Don't ask...  but I am grateful and thankful for life.

12.    Planners.  My world revolves around my planner. Without my planner, I would not only be in total chaos, but I would be chaos. I am most certain that planners were specifically designed just for me. I am so honored.

13.  Men's boxers.   Men do not know how grateful they should be having boxers designed just for them.  I love men's boxers.  Not to just look at men in their boxers, but to wear them to bed as my trusty PJ's.  I just sew up the open space in the front, grab a matching t-shirt and wallah!  Night time nighties.

14.  Family.  Yes, I am blessed to be surrounded by my family, including all the good and the bad that is pulled out of their hats.  I wanted to say 'crap' pulled out of their hats, but I refrained.  Just thought you should know my real thoughts.  The 'crap' makes us thankful for the 'good'. Right?  So, in recapping item #14, I am thankful for the crap that is pulled out of my family's hat.  It is good to have crap every now and then.  Crap reminds you of the opposite, Good family times.

Glad I was able to share my the many blessings given to me on this day of Thanksgiving.

Thessalonians 5:18  "In all circumstances give thanks, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus".







Sunday, November 23, 2014

The Parable of the Lost "Daughter"


Siblings...

I have always prayed a prayer for my children to be best friends. The prayer began when they were babies and continued as they became toddlers, teens and as adults.  Three of my four children are inseparable.  Of the four children I have been blessed to have, one child has chosen to walk away from our family.  The other three children do not have an opportunity to be best friends and come to know her as an adult. She has been on her own for two years.  They do not miss her now.  She is a memory to them.  They have moved on from the initial pain that she created.  They have developed among themselves a very close bond.  They are, once again, inseparable. They lift each other up when they are down and enjoy the success in each other's lives.  My heart aches for my daughter that left and for my other three that choose to remain.  They are all missing out on so much, as am I, and my husband.  There is much pain.  

My daughter that left and is walking a different path also walked away from God and all the blessings he has bestowed upon her. I suspect one day she will return, possibly...and my question is always, how will we ever restore what has been lost?  We won't. There will always be gaps in the story line of our family.   

I look at this picture above and I just smile.  It is tender, sweet and you get a sense of generous love.  This is not a picture of a boy and young girl dating, simply brother and sister.  They enjoy each other's company when in each other's presence.  

I debated just recently to have our family pictures taken by a photographer for our annual Christmas pictures/cards.  We have not had them taken in two years. My youngest of the four reminded me that we are still a family with or without the daughter missing.  We still have many things to be thankful for, especially each other. I get a little frustrated that they do not share the pain that I still do, but they also did not give birth to her, raise and love her as did I. The picture will not be complete.      

The Parable of the Lost Son is a parable I have been visiting quite frequently.  I read with new understanding of this parable.  This son, as my daughter, has squandered much.  My daughter as did the son has had no regard for the course of his/her actions or those that they have hurt while on their selfish journey.  And I ask myself each day, will I be able to be as humble as the father that embraced his son that returned?  Will I be as humble to one day resume a relationship with my daughter if she chooses to come home? Most days I say 'yes', other days, those when I am experiencing humiliation, anger and pain, I tell my self 'no way'.  She deserves what she has created.  I think to myself, why should I allow her to return?  Then, as I go through my day, there may be a sweet reminder of  her and I begin my yearning for her all over again.  

I take each day, day by day, now simply enjoying the family that embraces me and each other.  I am most blessed, but the pain remains. 

There will be family pictures this year with those that choose to be family.  We will continue to create family memories.  We will continue to grow closer and love one another.  We will continue to pray for my missing daughter and my prayer is the "Parable of the Lost Daughter".  

My blessings of three, will remind me to say "cheese".